Bombs Away
by g o o d btye
Summary: A request from Barbacar / Chara is on a mission to kill all monsters after Frisk released them all to the Surface. The Princess of Spiders is next on their list.


_Creak._

The door swung open, casting a long ray of light across the wooden floorboards. They stepped inside, squinting against the darkness within. They waited for their eyes to adjust, listening to the rapid skittering of what could only be thousands of spiders hiding from the new light. They fought not to squirm, they wanted to crush each and every one of them beneath their foot. That was not what they were there for, though. They could deal with that after they had finished what they had come to do.

Once their eyes had adjusted, they made their way to the spiral staircase. The air was chilly, and a breeze wafted in from within the still-open door. As they walked carefully up the dark staircase, they wondered why the door had been unlocked. Perhaps she expected them. Perhaps she was prepared to fight. If that were the case, they would have to be very careful.

It took nearly ten long minutes of walking up the staircase in pitch blackness. They were slowed by their lack of sight, causing each step to be carefully done. They could almost feel thousands upon thousands of eyes on them, the eyes of spiders all around.

Finally reaching the top of the staircase, they were met with a locked door. Instead of knocking, they retrieved their knife which was hidden within the deep pockets of their shorts. It took several attempts-many missing due to the fact that they could not tell exactly where the knob was at first-before they managed to get a few good impacts that dislodged the knob. It clattered to the ground, and they could hear it as it rolled down the spiral staircase while the door before them creaked open.

They stepped inside and were nearly blinded from the natural light that flooded in from the open balcony ahead. They found themself squinting again, blinking rapidly in an attempt to quickly adjust their vision. The hot smell of a bakery overwhelmed them, and the smoky air choked their lungs a bit. A deep laugh came from ahead, and they managed to peek through the cracks in their fingers. The familiar silhouette of the Princess of Spiders stood, leaning against the stone railing of said balcony.

"Chara."

Their vision adjusted quickly, and they lowered their arm, slamming the door shut behind them. Their grip on the handle of their knife tightened.

" _Bienvenue_ , Chara." She straightened, strutting smoothly toward them, chewing her big purple cigar. Her hair, usually held up in pigtails, reached down to her waist in a smooth dark curtain. It rippled as she took each step, almost hypnotic when watched for too long. Her many eyes gazed upon them, "You've come to fight me, eh, vieil ami?"

Chara was silent, they merely narrowed their eyes, shifting their stance as they began to circle around, keeping a safe distance between themself and their enemy. She grinned.

"Come on, then. Have at you." She raised all six of her arms, as if leaving herself open for an attack. Chara lunged forward, knife at the ready. Before they could get near, Muffet leapt into the air, her lowest left hand flying into her pocket and pulling out a muffin-shaped object with a candle on top. Holding it up to her lit cigar, she allowed the candle to light.

Chara was already partially mid-air and saw it coming as the cupcake bomb was thrown at them. They were thrown back as they attempted to bat it away with the knife, only succeeding in detonating it. They slammed into the wooden floorboards, the planks cracking from the impact. The knife was knocked from their grip, and their eyes squeezed shut as their head slammed into the floor, as well. They sat there, immobilized from shock for a few moments, their ears ringing deafeningly.

Muffet's maniacal laugh rang out through the room, and they could hear the fuse of another bomb being lit by her cigar. They gritted their teeth and forced themself to stand, opening their eyes and struggling to look around for their knife. The sharp blade was lodged deep into the floorboards several feet away. They quickly leapt for it, but missed by nearly a foot due to their double vision caused from the impact. They managed to grip the handle after landing beside it, but they were suddenly blown into the wall hard from the explosion of another bomb.

This time as they were thrown through the air, they knew what to expect. They had managed to keep a hold on the knife, and the explosion that threw them managed to allow them to rip the knife from its place. This time, they clutched it so hard their knuckles turned pale. As they hit the wall, they allowed themself a few moments to recover from another spell of dizziness before looking at Muffet, who was across the room grinning. A quick look at their HP told them that they were already at nearly half health.

An animalistic growl escaped their lips, and they hurriedly retrieved an Instant Noodles from their pocket and downed it quickly, watching their HP rise. A quick glance at Muffet made their eyes go wide as they watched her light six bombs simultaneously. They began sprinting away to the side, hoping the bombs would miss.

 _BAM._

 _BAM. BAM._

 _BAM._

 _BAM._

 _BAM._

None of the bombs directly hit them, but the shaking of the floor and the explosion itself threw them forward slightly, as if giving them a boost but not actually throwing them as they had before. They stumbled a bit, nearly falling face-first into the floorboards. They caught themself on their hand and pushed off the ground, running into the wall from their momentum. They turned to see Muffet standing with her severals sets of arms crossed across her front.

She fixed them with a sharp gaze. What made it more uncomfortable was that fact that she had several eyes. They shuddered a bit under the unwavering stare.

"You can't even get a single hit, mon ami?" She chuckled deeply, shaking her head which made her silky dark hair sway hypnotically. "What a shame. Oh well. You're boring me, let's make this more fun, eh?"

She brought two slim fingers up to her mouth and let out a piercing whistle that forced Chara to cover their ears. From the darkest corner of the room, a loud growl came. Chara turned their gaze to the source to see a huge cupcake spider creature emerging. A large, unlit candle sat upon its top. Large, jagged teeth stuck out in a severe overbite. Chara shifted their stance to a more suitable fighting position, their breathing heavy from the panic fueled by the recent explosions.

Muffet strutted over and stroked a hand across one of the several long, spindly legs. The creature seemed to purr, leaning into the touch. Chara shuddered a bit, trying not to look at the creature. Too big to crush under a foot.

"Say hello to Mr. Tuffet. _Mon bébé_." She cooed as she removed the fat purple cigar from her mouth. She held it up to the wick of the candle and it sparked up. Chara immediately caught on.

Mr. Tuffet, as she called it, was a walking time bomb; they had less than a minute to defuse it. They ran forward, stuffing their hand into their pocket and fishing around. They retrieved some Nice Cream, a cold delight that could surely extinguish the fuse. Before they could get near enough, though, the bakery-scented cigar was back in Muffet's mouth and several more small bombs were flying through the air to meet Chara.

They were unable to dodge due to their momentum, and were thrown back against the far wall with impact that cracked stone. They let out a pained groan, and squinted at their HP, which had dropped more than half. They hurriedly shoved the Nice Cream in their mouth to recover, retrieving the last one they had in their pocket. Muffet was lighting more bombs, and Mr. Tuffet was lumbering forward. The room, Chara noticed, was now tinted purple from the oddly colored smoke coming from the cigar.

Said smoke choked their lungs, and they were starting to have difficulty breathing. The problem with possessing a body was that any limitations of that body must be abided by. Frisk, the true owner of the body, had asthma. Chara did not have Frisk's inhaler, so if they did not hurry they could lose to an asthma attack.

They hurriedly charged toward the cupcake spider. Its fuse was less than an inch away from going off. If they did not get the Nice Cream on the fuse within the next few moments, it would all be over. They drew their arm back, aiming to throw the Nice Cream with all their strength in an attempt to put out the fuse as fast as they could

Their arm flew forward, their fingers released the Nice Cream.

 _BAM._

Chara was thrown back for a final time. They slammed into the stone wall with a loud, piercing crack! and sunk to the floor. They let out a soft groan, their eyes rolling back slightly from pain. Their head pounded, and they could feel their heart racing. Muffet laughed, she had taken refuge in the upper corner of the room. She jumped out of the shadows, landing with a graceful step on the floor.

"Finished already, _mon ami_?" She cooed, tilting her head. She approached and bent over at a nearly ninety degree angle to reach the collar of Chara's shirt. They pulled them up, and though Chara squirmed a bit they could not free themself. They did not even have the energy to reach into their pocket to retrieve another healing item.

Bakery-scented smoke overwhelmed their hazy mind. Muffet dragged the nearly-lifeless Chara toward the balcony. They squinted against the even brighter light as they emerged into the chilly air. They trembled a bit from weakness as they attempted to lift their arm to block out the sunlight. Muffet set her path on a large purple cannon. Chara's eyes went wide a bit as they tried to focus on the cannon and clear their head. They wanted to get away, but no matter how they tried they were simply too weak.

Muffet forced their body into the cannon, and they could not fight back. They could hear the fuse spark.

" _Au revoir, mon ami_."

And they went flying.

* * *

 **BONUS ENDING**

The cigar touched the candle-esque fuse. Muffet backed off quickly, grinning as she watched Chara from the sidelines with several eyes. Chara carefully watched the monstrous cupcake spider. It lumbered toward them slowly, its large body somehow held up by slender legs. Chara shuddered a bit, tightening their grip on the knife.

Chara began to circle the strange creature, formulating a plan as quickly as their mind could work. It was getting a bit hazy from inhaling all the purple smoke that was rapidly clogging up the air. They could almost hear a click in their head as the idea fell into place.

Walking slowly, a careful step, they loosened their grip on the knife. They would avoid fighting as much as they could. Unfortunately, their main enemy had slipped their mind, and they were caught off guard when a donut-shaped bomb exploded at their feet and threw them shoulder-first into the wall. They yelled out in pain and watched their HP drop by half. They quickly stood, despite being very dizzy from the impact. They took a glance at Mr. Tuffet's fuse and saw that it was nearly halfway run down.

They began to run across the room, heading in the direction of the Princess of Spiders. She seemed a bit surprised by this, her eyes widening ever so slightly. She smirked a bit, and her eyes flicked over to Mr. Tuffet, who was lumbering after them.

They tightened their grip on the knife as Muffet began to light another bomb. They suddenly pushed off the ground and leapt high into the air as the bomb sailed toward them. It flew under their feet and hit the ground, exploding harmlessly there. The only thing it did was make a small crater in the wooden floorboards.

Muffet gasped a bit in surprise and quickly threw her head back to look up at them as they sailed above her. Another glance at the fuse showed that it would go off within moments. Chara landed hard on the ground and sprinted for the balcony. Before Mr. Tuffet could turn, Muffet realized how much danger she was in.

As Chara burst onto the balcony, squinting against the even brighter direct sunlight, the cupcake spider monster exploded.

 _BAM._

Muffet let out a piercing shriek. Chara hurried back inside to see a burnt-out Mr. Tuffet and a nearly incapacitated Muffet. They chuckled darkly, hurrying over and ripping the fat, purple cigar from her mouth and biting down on it themself. They grabbed her by one of her many limp arms. She groaned, forcing her eyes halfway open as they dragged her out onto the balcony.

They approached the cannon, and she quickly realized her fate.

"No, no, no, no! Don't do this, _mon am_ i, please!" Her voice was weak and quiet, but she pleaded as hard as she could, unable to move her body to fight back. Chara forced her body into the cannon, grinning as they chewed the cigar. The taste of a bakery flooded their mouth. Purple smoke wafted into the air.

Slowly, they removed the cigar from their mouth and lit the fuse.

" _Bon voyage, mon ami_." Chara taunted.

 _BOOM._

Muffet was nothing but a twinkle in the sky. Chara returned to the room, twirling the cigar between their fingers. Opening Muffet's closet, they found it loaded with all sorts of explosive bakery-themed items. They stuffed their pockets to the max before turning their gaze to the supcake spider. Mr. Tuffet's fuse was regenerating, growing back. Chara did not allow it to reach its full height before relighting it with the cigar. They hurried out to the balcony as Mr. Tuffet tried to stand, legs wobbly from exhaustion caused by the previous explosion.

Chara lit the refreshed fuse of the cannon before clambering in fast. Their eyes lit up as they aimed the cannon toward their hometown. They knew they'd be welcomed with cheers. The Princess of Spiders was gone for good.

With a resounding boom, Chara was flying through the air.


End file.
